opentheairforfreshwindows:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

did you hear about the italian chef who died?

he pasta way

he just ran out of thyme

here today, gone tomato

his wife is still upset, cheese still not over it

we never sausage a tragedy coming

ashes to ashes, crust to crust

there’s just not mushroom for italian chefs in today’s world

spaghetti

(Source: sofunnyimcryan, via spoken-not-written)

times-like-these7:

sorelatable:

If your name is on one of these I just wanna let you know your parents are basic bitches with no creativity

image

Sounds like someone’s sad they couldn’t find their name on a coke bottle

(via firelordray)

willow-wanderings:

thebicker:

^^^^^HOW PRIVILEGE WORKS.

YES THIS IS EXACTLY IT.

(Source: supermans, via firelordray)

sloth-grunge:

when your mom says she’ll just be a minute

image

(via firelordray)

camel-no:

5 Points will be deducted from Gryffindor ‘cause Harry’s being a little bitch

(via salt-and-pepper-panda)

womandroid4001:

womandroid4001:

why do straight boys walk so slow

image

(Source: pinfad, via firelordray)

greed:

i want to kiss you and take cute pictures with you and go on stupid dates but I also want tO DESTRYO YOU AT MAR IO KART

(Source: longful, via spoken-not-written)